


fall after me

by VerdantMoth



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Dysfunctional Family, Family Feels, Implied Relationships, Jotunn | Frost Giant, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 04:14:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17594432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VerdantMoth/pseuds/VerdantMoth
Summary: Loki’s skin fades away during the night, and he wakes up blue and alone in the bed he once shared with his brother. He doesn’t notice at first, doesn’t think of the way his skin feels like it fits for the first time in his life.It isn’t until he’s walking down a long marble hallway and people are staring at him that he suddenly sees the hue of his skin, feels the ridges beneath his fingers, that his world cracks into place.





	fall after me

Loki’s skin fades away during the night, and he wakes up blue and alone in the bed he once shared with his brother. He doesn’t notice at first, doesn’t think of the way his skin feels like it fits for the first time in his life. 

It isn’t until he’s walking down a long marble hallway and people are staring at him that he suddenly sees the hue of his skin _ ,  _ feels the ridges beneath his fingers, that his world cracks into place. 

Word of his condition reaches Odin long before Loki does, and his father stares at his youngest with the kind of heavy gaze that means Loki is going to hate the words he hears next. He smiles grimly at his father and takes his seat, waves his hands until there’s a goblet of chilled juice an a platter of fruits before him. He can hear Thor’s footsteps clacking against the stone, long before his brother enters the room. 

Loki’s just placed a dripping, tart thing in his mouth when he hears Thor suck in a breath. “Unfunny, brother,” he says. “Fix it.” 

Thor slams into the seat before Loki, reaching for his own goblet. He watches his brother, but Loki continues to pick fruits out. 

“He can’t,” Odin finally says. It sounds heavy, final like a diagnosis that can’t be cured. 

Thor swings his gaze towards his father, fisted hands already slamming against the table. “Of course he can, this is some stupid prank. A bad joke on an important day.” He turns his rage back on Loki. “Drop the glamour, brother. Be done with your games.” 

Loki picks up a cloth napkin and dabs at his lips. He folds it and gently sets it back on the table, skin prickling for the first time since he woke up. “Father is right for once, idiot brother, for this is no scheme of mine.” 

Not that he hasn’t considered something so drastic. 

Thor’s face turns red, then purple, then settles. “Fix it.” he demands once more. The skies crack around them, or maybe it’s just Loki’s heart. 

“Would that I knew how,” he says quietly. He turns towards his father. “Any suggestions? You lack the surprise one would expect in this situation.” 

Odin taps his fingers a few times and studies both of his sons. Thor’s hand grips his fork so tight the utensils bends and Loki’s vibrating so hard he nearly vanishes. “Perhaps, Loki, this is a conversation best had behind closed doors.” 

“So you can hide away whatever crime you’ve committed?” Loki seeths and Odin shoots him a dark look. 

“No, Loki, but because the explanation is long and not meant for curious ears.” 

Loki slings his fork in the vicinity Odin’s head, “I am not a mistake you can hide away. Whatever is wrong with me, whatever you have done to me, you will confess it here and now. Fix it.” 

Odin glances at Thor again, and Loki can see fear in his father’s eyes. The kind of fear that settles against his spine and curdles between his ribs. “Father, what is wrong with me.” 

“I do not know how this has come to happen, Loki, why the glamour has fallen,” Odin steeples his fingers under his chin, thoughtfully. “It is perhaps your own natural enthusiasm, your own talents overriding what I am capable of.” He tilts his head. “I had hoped, at a time when you had come more into yourself to tell you the story of your birth, Loki. To prepare you for…” Odin trails off, unable to find the words. 

He turns towards his elder son. “Thor,” he says gently, “where have you seen the patterns on his skin before?” 

Thor looks at his father, unamused. “Jotunheim, on the skin of the Frost Giants. But Loki should not know this pattern.” He says it with the same judgment he condemned Odin with for leaving Loki behind that time. 

Odin shakes his head, and dread slinks down Loki’s spine. He doesn’t want to know anymore, doesn’t want to hear the words about to fall. “Loki is of Jotunheim.” 

Thor’s rage overshadows any reaction Loki might have, his words shaking the palace. Loki, for the most part, tunes him out. Odin attempts to explain, or something, but Loki does not need to know anymore. He calmly pushes his plate and blinks, takes himself to the cave he used to hide in, the one that sits at the edge of the world.

\---

Thor finds him later. The boisterous god is surprisingly quiet as he sits beside his brother. There’s space between them, more so than has been for at least a century. 

“Do I disgust you, brother?” Loki says quietly. 

He studies his own hand, and a cruel part of him thinks the blue is actually quite beautiful. Some absent part of him wants to know if there’s meaning to the thick lines carving past his wrist and around his knuckles. He is afraid to see how far they extend, or perhaps afraid to admit he already knows. 

“No.” There’s no question or hesitation in Thor’s answer. “Did you think you would?” 

Loki digs his nails into his palms and sits on his hands. “I disgust myself.” 

Thor laughs and it’s startling. Loki flinches beside him, feet dangling over the edge of the land. “You do not brother. You find yourself even more enchanting in this form. Don’t think I didn’t see the mirror tucked in the folds of your cloak.” 

The answer sets Loki on edge, if only because it’s not wrong. “My skin is poison,” he snaps. 

Thor places one hand over Loki’s thumb tracing the markings like they’re rivers to explore. “I seem to be just fine,” he says quietly. 

“Wrong, all wrong.” Loki tells him. 

Thor turns towards his brother, grabs his chin between his fingers. “Loki, brother. Nothing about you has ever been more right.” 

It’s… almost romantic. Loki snorts. “You say that because you want to know if other parts of me have also changed. Yes, by the way, I’m even larger now.”

Thor laughs, but he doesn’t deny it. Instead he leans down and presses a chaste kiss to Loki’s lips. “You taste the same, at least.” 

Loki does laugh at that, tangling his fingers in Thor’s blond braid. 

Thor releases him after a while, fingers skimming over Loki’s belly and dipping into the valleys, tracing over the ridges. “Why do you come here, brother?” 

“Because,” Loki says quiet, unsure if he is ready for this confession. “Because from here, I could fall anywhere.” 

Thor looks at him with an intensity rarely seen in his blue eyes. “If you fall, I’ll catch you. And if I could not, I would fall after you.”


End file.
